Joining the New Elite: A How-to Guide (Part 1)

Josh Barro Elite


The Old Elite made money, made movies and got elected to public office. Those days are over. Young people entering into life might not understand that the paradigm has shifted, and that those seeking social status no longer go by this outdated model. The New Elite is a group of youngish people that doesn’t actually produce anything, but is highly visible in liberal online magazines and low-rated cable news shows. This guide will help those seeking to join this exciting new club.

Where to go to school

Ideally, Harvard. An undergraduate degree from Harvard is a license to expound upon subjects that one doesn’t understand. Normally that right is reserved for Ph.Ds.

Unfortunately, not everyone’s father is a professor at Harvard, so most people will have to take the second route. If Harvard is out of the question, find an expensive private school on the East Coast, preferably in New England. Since there are about 500 of these in the Boston metro area alone, it shouldn’t be hard to find one that will accept you, provided you can take out a large enough loan. (Don’t worry about paying it back. That’s for the little people.)

Your major doesn’t matter, but be sure to minor in something with the word “Studies” in it. You don’t need to be a particularly good student, but take notes every time your professors mention Karl Marx, George W. Bush, colonialism, white privilege, heteronormativity, and other related topics. This will be important later.

A word of caution: It might be tempting to work hard in high school in order to be admitted into a prestigious public school such as UC Berkeley or UT Austin. This is a mistake on two levels. First, the stench of the commoner will never wear off. Second, this is about joining the New Elite, not about doing anything important. Hard work is a waste of time.

Next up: I graduated; where should I live?

Logic and Reason Are Symbols of White Privilege

I’ve thought about writing a quick and dirty primer on the pseudo-intellectual basis for this kind of thought (with cosplay girls, ’cause that’s how I roll.) If that sounds interesting to anyone, let me know. Until then, it appears that the debate club has become the latest victim in the campus left’s War on Thought.

Over four hours, the two teams engaged in a heated discussion of concepts like “nigga authenticity” and performed hip-hop and spoken-word poetry in the traditional timed format. At one point during Lee’s rebuttal, the clock ran out but he refused to yield the floor. “Fuck the time!” he yelled. His partner Campbell, who won the top speaker award at the National Debate Tournament two weeks later, had been unfairly targeted by the police at the debate venue just days before, and cited this personal trauma as evidence for his case against the government’s treatment of poor African-Americans.

The topic of the debate was supposed to be the limits of presidential war powers, in case you’re curious. Debate coaches and writing teachers used to encourage students to take sides that they didn’t believe in order to strengthen their debating skills. Now, multiculturalism and self-esteem dictate that students can simply pick their own topics.

How does a society survive when a sizable number of its population can simply dismiss things like logic, reason and statistics as “white privilege” and academic institutions encourage it? When the very concept of fact is seen as a tool of the oppressor, we might as well make policy decisions by cutting a chicken’s head off and asking Lord Zeebo to interpret the blood pattern for us. We could replace presidential elections with battle rapping contests.

The people who are teaching perpetual grievance studies have to know that they’re creating useless, thin-skinned malcontents who won’t be able to hold a job. Don’t they? I mean, what is the end game here?

Vox Day writes,

If I were a college student these days, I would show up for a debate wearing a dress and smeared red lipstick, and no matter what the resolution was, start rapping very passionately about how the more pressing issue was how the U.S. government refused to let me marry a silverback gorilla.

Vox would probably win the debate for the cross-dressing alone, and the bestiality would be a clincher. Read his whole take on this.

Watch Western Civilization as it descends into Hell:

Rule 5 Linkfest: Is Jennifer Lawrence Dating Bigfoot?

Jennifer Lawrence Bikini Beach
Bigfoot’s new paramour?


Blackmailers Don’t Shoot has received another anonymous tip, this time alleging that actress Jennifer Lawrence was at the Corey Helford Gallery in Culver City with the legendary cryptid Sasquatch. We are investigating this latest report in a growing series of bizarre rumors.

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: Barbara Eden

American Power: Sofia Vergara for Women’s Health Magazine

The Daley Gator: Vanessa Lachey and Kirsten Dunst

Proof Positive: Kim Kardashian

Pirate’s Cove: Happy Easter

Jennifer Lawrence
Could not be reached for comment.

Two weeks ago, rumors swirled that the American Hustle actress had been abducted by space aliens from the Sirius galaxy. It is thus not certain whether Bigfoot was allegedly spotted with Ms. Lawrence or her Nexus-6 android body double.

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick Of The Late Night and Smoking Redhead

EBL: Lourdes Torres-Manteufel

The Camp of the Saints: Page 666: Making The End Of Days Fun

A View from the Beach: A is for Angelica

Soylent Green: T-GIF Friday

Jennifer Lawrence in a dress
Actress or android?

Sasquatch is said to have been overheard saying, “Yes, it can be quite intimidating to date someone this famous. There are flash bulbs going off every time we try to go out. Say, where can I get more of those cocktail weenies?”

Woodsterman: Blonder Than

Sad Man’s Tongue: Italian Pin Up Girl Debbie Mit Cake

PostalDog: So Winnie’s Still Killin’ It at DWTS Rehersals

Animal Magnetism: Saturday Gingermageddon

The Year of Halloween: 31 Halloween Activities #3: Wear a Sexy Costume

We will keep our readers updated on this fascinating story. Until then, enjoy your weekends.

Linked at Pirate’s Cove, 90 Miles from Tyranny and The Other McCain. Gracias!

Trigger Warning: You Put Your Assumption in My Self Esteem

Lest anyone think that an education at UC Santa Barbara is all fun and parties, the UCSB Microaggressions Facebook page reminds us that the struggle continues. This brave warrior took someone to task over a correct assumption.

UCSB SnowflakeIt’s refreshing to know that literacy no longer takes precedence over social justice in one of the nation’s most prestigious public university systems.

Wednesday Linkfest: Delicious Demon

Jennifer Lawrence American Hustle

In spite of having no original content since Saturday, Blackmailers Don’t Shoot is experiencing its best consistent traffic since the blog started. Behold the power of Jennifer Lawrence and Rule 5. Linkfest!


The Other McCain: Anti-Israel Extremist Max Blumenthal Cited by Overland Park Jew-Killer

Regular Right Guy: Rachel Maddow Tries Insightful, Misses

American Power: Ukraine Mobilizes Against Russia-Backed Separatists

The Camp of the Saints: The Left Has No Better Angels In Their Natures

The Political Hat: In Collaboration We Trust

The Daley Gator: Is Joe Biden Mentally Ill or Just Plain Stupid?

Michelle Malkin: Debunking the Blame Righty Propagandists…Again - The scummy Southern Poverty Law Center strikes again.

Anti Idiotarian Rottweiler: On the Nevada Situation

The Lonely Conservative: Al Qaeda Meets Openly While NYC Stops Investigation Of Muslims - Bill de Blasio’s New York.

Protein Wisdom: Bloomberg Launches Everytown for Gun Safety - Speaking of awful New York mayors.

For San Fernando Valley peeps: Susan Shelley for CA Assembly District 45

Vault Boy

I’m actually going to be in Nevada for the next two days. Not on Clyven Bundy related stuff. I’m picking up a car. In other words, blogging will be very light this week.

Culture and Stuff

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: Concept of Innocence – HUGE Photo Dump

That Mr G Guy’s Blog: Freedom From Religion Foundation Sets Sights On Clemson University

Monster Hunter Nation: Larry F. Correia, International Lord of Hate

L.A. Daily News: Wu-Tang Clan-Associated Rapper Cuts off Penis, Jumps off Building in Suicide Try

Andrew J Patrick: Rolling Stone Trolls Us All with Naked Julia-Louise Dreyfus, U.S. History Fail

Manhattan Infidel: Help NBC Create Its Next Sitcom Smash!

Domestic Geek Girl: Alien Hunting in Roswell, New Mexico

The Frustrated CFO: The Models Are Falling! The Models Are Falling!

The Year of Halloween: Happy Easter: Thirteen Bizarre Bunny GIFs

I’m cutting out early. Happy Hump Day!

Floatopia Retrospective: Rule 5 Linkfest


 Alas, Floatopia 2009 at UC Santa Barbara was such a disaster for sobriety and the beach that it was never allowed to become a full-blown tradition. I remember it well. I was at home in Goleta and read about it in the paper. Linkfest!

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: Elizabeth Montgomery and Songkram

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick Of The Late Night and Morning Mistress

EBL: Anna Kendrick on SNL Rule 5

 American Power: Jessica Davies Wins Hot Shots Calendar Competition

Proof Positive: Friday Night Babe Ashley Doris

The Daley Gator: Daley Gator Daley Baba Wioletta Pawluck

The Camp of the Saints: Sarah McDonald

UCSD FloatopiaIn 2010 UC San Diego followed suit and held their own version of Floatopia. The idea is that if participants are floating out in the bay, they can ignore the open container laws. It won’t stop police from busting them for public intoxication, but that’s not my problem.

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

Woodsterman: Blonderer

Soylent Green: And That, Son, Is Why I Became A Hobo

Sad Man’s Tongue: Pin Up Girl Suzy Starliner Is Our Kind Of Calendar Girl

PostalDog: So Winnie’s Still Killin’ It at DWTS Rehersals

A View from the Beach: Girls of the Blacklist

Animal Magnetism: Saturday Blondepocalypse

Floatopia Fail

UC San Diego’s Floatopia only drew about 700 people in 2010 out of an expected 5000. Compare that to the 2009 UCSB Floatopia, which drew an estimated 12,000 young chowderheads to Isla Vista. Clearly, UCSB is the superior party school.

Everyone have a great weekend!

L.A. Daily News Runs Doom and Gloom Article on Tim Donnelly

The Daily News leans (lists?) center-right, so the prospect of Donnelly winning the gubernatorial primary likely makes them nervous. Well, we ran Meg Whitman. We ran Carly Fiorina. Famed centrist Arnold Schwarzenegger was only slightly less disastrous than Jerry Brown. So who’s afraid of the big bad Tea Party?

Even though no Republican is likely to give Brown a true challenge in a one-on-one battle in November, the new poll suggests the California GOP continues to drift farther from the mainstream and is increasingly losing relevance as the state grows more diverse and more Democratic.

“This is a battle for the soul of the Republican Party,” said Larry Gerston, a political-science professor at San Jose State. “If Donnelly prevails, it indicates that the fiscal conservatives, the evangelical conservatives and the Tea Party conservatives control the party and leave Republicans with little opportunity to succeed in the long run. If [Bush Administration lackey] Kashkari can break through, it would be a sea change, and for the first time in 30 years, the party would show that it has some control of the middle.”

Got that? The Republican Party is no place for “the fiscal conservatives, the evangelical conservatives and the Tea Party conservatives.” You know, the people who vote for Republican candidates.

Short of the proverbial dead woman or live boy, Jerry Brown will be reelected in November. He is, for unknown reasons, very popular. That being said, if you want to get Republican butts out the door on election day, run the guy that people are actually excited about. The base in California isn’t any different from the base in Texas. There just aren’t as many of us.

Personally, I would crawl through broken glass to write in Donnelly’s name on the ballot just to make a statement, and I’m sure plenty of conservatives are of the same opinion. Enthusiasm might not be enough to swing the governor’s race, but it can certainly swing a few down ticket races. With the current Democratic supermajority in the legislature, shouldn’t that be more of a concern?

Shocker: Gathering of Drunk, Half-Naked College Students Ends in Disaster


Reason number 500 why I never lived in Isla Vista. UC Santa Barbara students throw a big Spring Break party every year, always with predictable results.

Dozens of people were hurt and about 100 people were arrested as violence erupted at Deltopia, an unauthorized street party in Isla Vista.

Authorities estimate at least 15,000 people attended the annual party on Saturday. Deltopia draws crowds in the thousands every year, mainly students from UC Santa Barbara and surrounding colleges.

Before the trouble even started, law enforcement had arrested 56 people and issued 49 citations. At least 44 people were taken to the hospital for injuries, including alcohol poisoning.

The party used to be called called Floatopia, so dubbed because the besotted students would get on rafts and float out into the ocean. Police closed the beaches during the party after 2009 when partygoers trashed the beach and 33 were hospitalized. Last year an 18 year old Cal Poly San Luis Obispo student died after falling from a cliff.

More innocent times.

I will say this for the Deltopians, though: there is something refreshingly honest about a good old beer and hormone fueled riot. There was no talk of “transformative justice” as the intrepid Gauchos assaulted cops and firefighters and no complaints of microaggressions from cis-hetero white people. Sure, UCSB has its own ninny contingent, but for the most part Isla Vista residents are content to get drunk and set their couches on fire.

Update: Funny coincidence. Donald Douglas at American Power was writing about this at the same time. Go check out ‘Deltopia’ Riot at UC Santa Barbara’s Isla Vista Community.

Rule 5: Has Jennifer Lawrence Been Abducted by Aliens?

Jennifer Lawrence on FireBlackmailers Don’t Shoot received a tip that Jennifer Lawrence has been kidnapped by extraterrestrials from a small, unknown planet in the Sirius Galaxy. The source, who wishes to remain anonymous, said that Lawrence was replaced with a model of the highly advanced Nexus-6 android. Linkfest!

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: Raquel Welch and Other Cool Stuff

American Power: Right Wing Extremist Kristina Ribali!

90 Miles from Tyranny: Blogs With Rule 5 Links and Girls With Guns

EBL: So what is in store for Game of Thrones Season 4?

The Other McCain: Rule 5 Sunday: Up Periscope

Jennifer Lawrence WetSome cynical people might think that our concern for Ms. Lawrence’s wellbeing is simply a cheap exercise in traffic whoring. To those people we say, “Well why should Buzzfeed have all the fun. You wanna take it outside?”

Proof Positive: Friday Night Babe Tami Erin

The Daley Gator: DaleyGator DaleyBabe Linda Rondstadt

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

The Camp of the Saints: Rule 5 News: 06 April 2014 A.D.

Woodsterman: Any Given Sunday

Jennifer Lawrence Black DressIf you think you see Jennifer Lawrence on the street, do not approach her. The Nexus-6 android is very strong and very clever. Your safety cannot be guaranteed. Check Blackmailers Don’t Shoot daily for updates.

Soylent Green: T-GIF Friday

Sad Man’s Tongue: Inked Girls Gallery 141: The Mr. Jersey Edition

PostalDog: Boy, Get off the Grid for a Few Days – Miley Cyrus Rule 5.

A View from the Beach: The Hot New Viking – Alyssa Sutherland

Animal Magnetism: Saturday Gingermageddon

Stay safe out there friends.