The Invisible Hand Delivers a Beatdown

It turns out that the same basic laws of economics apply for academics just as much as they apply for fast food workers. If an idiot Republican like me can figure out supply and demand, why is it that the self-styled most brilliant people on the planet can’t figure it out as well?

It is 2011 and I’m sitting in the Palais des Congres in Montreal, watching anthropologists talk about structural inequality.

Of course they’re talking about structural inequality. That’s all that anyone in the Humanities and Social Sciences talks about. Sure, English professors talk about structural inequality in the works of Edmund Spenser and anthropologists talk about structural inequality among members of the O’ny’ongo’go tribe post colonization, but everyone is more or less rehashing Marx, Foucault and Derrida. The only skill that these disciplines are teaching is the ability to shove anything through a Social Justice filter, which creates a totally interchangeable workforce. And these people wonder why jobs are scarce.

My friend is an adjunct. She has a PhD in anthropology and teaches at a university, where she is paid $2100 per course. While she is a professor, she is not a Professor. She is, like  67 per cent of American university faculty, a part-time employee on a contract that may or may not be renewed each semester. She receives no benefits or health care.

There are too many people with PhDs in anthropology and not enough people studying it, so the universities can hire faculty at lower wages. To make matters worse, the universities sold a bright future of stable employment and a cool job in exchange for tens of thousands of dollars in debt. This generation of grad students simply wound up on the dumping end of a Ponzi scheme.

Why is my friend, a smart woman with no money, spending nearly $2000 to attend a conference she cannot afford? She is looking for a way out. In America, academic hiring is rigid and seasonal. Each discipline has a conference, usually held in the fall, where interviews take place. These interviews can be announced days or even hours in advance, so most people book beforehand, often to receive no interviews at all.

Welcome to the job market. You need them more than they need you. For perspective, in order to get the first of two in-person interviews at my current job, I had to go through a phone screening, a personality test and a thinly veiled IQ test. All that aside, I would have laughed at them if they charged me $2000 for the opportunity.

The American Anthropological Association tends to hold its meetings in America’s most expensive cities, although they do have one stipulation: “AAA staff responsible for negotiating and administering annual meeting contracts shall show preference to locales with living wage ordinances.” This rule does not apply, unfortunately, to those in attendance.

Who knew? Left wing professors are a bunch of pious hypocrites.

Academia is vaunted for being a meritocracy.

No it isn’t. It’s about networking and showing up in the right places.

Anthropologists are known for their attentiveness to social inequality, but few have acknowledged the plight of their peers. When I expressed doubt about the job market to one colleague, she advised me, with total seriousness, to “re-evaluate what work means” and to consider “post-work imaginaries”.

Translation: She got hers. Whatever happens to everyone else is just too bad. When confronted directly, bury the questioner in postmodern gobbledygook.

In May 2012, I received my PhD, but I still do not know what to do with it.

Do what a lot of people are doing and find a job in an unrelated field. Trust me, it ain’t that bad and you’ll probably make more money, which beats the hell out of starving to live the dream. Just don’t mention structural inequality during the interview. Business owners don’t like that kind of thing.

I struggle with the closed-off nature of academic work, which I think should be accessible to everyone, but most of all I struggle with the limited opportunities in academia for Americans like me, people for whom education was once a path out of poverty, and not a way into it.

The market spoke. You’re not as valuable as you would have been 50 years ago, and unless thousands of anthropology professors suddenly drop dead tomorrow, that will not likely change. It’s not personal. It’s not a conspiracy. There are simply too many people who want a job with lots of time off from which they cannot be fired.

The first step in recovery is admitting that there’s a problem.


#ShirtGate Rule 5: Chicks in Space!

Space ChickThis week human beings landed on a comet, and a bunch of feminists freaked out over something trivial. The more things change, the more they stay the same, my friends.

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: Claudia Cardinale and the Propaganda Concept

American Power: Francoise Boufhal #Rule5

The Other McCain: Rule 5 Sunday: Flowtation

The Daley Gator: Daleybabe

Nailgun Evi: Feminism and Lilith Rule 5

Star Wars BabesUnfortunately Dr. Taylor made a tearful apology, thereby setting the forces of sanity back a decade. Never apologize, never explain as the saying goes.

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick Of The Late Night and Morning Mistress Cameltoe

Proof Positive: Friday Night Babe Julianne Hough

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

Woodsterman: Excellence

Soylent Green: Corset Friday Fanfest

Space ChickWell, one man’s tearful apology is another man’s inspiration for a Rule 5 post, as everyone knows. Hopefully this whole incident will discourage feminists from going into science.

A View from the Beach: Rule 5 Saturday – Women of Interest

PostalDog: Kim Kardashian does the Micaela Schaefer

Animal Magnetism: Rule 5 Friday and Saturday Gingermageddon

Theo Spark: Saturday Night Is Bath Night

Happy weekend everyone!




Post-Election Day Rule 5

Patriotic Bikini

Fuck yeah!

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: Sexy Chinese Car Models

American Power: Just Smokin’ on Election Day

The Other McCain: Rule 5 Sunday: Absolutely 100% Lena Dunham Free

The Daley Gator: Daleybabe Michelle Baker

Nailgun Evi: Hillary Duff Rule 5

American Flag BikiniFuck yeah!

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick Of The Late Night and Morning Mistress

Proof Positive: Friday Night Babe Candice Swanepoel

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

Woodsterman: Fastest Car

Soylent Green: Corset Friday Fanfest

Jordyn Wieber Patriotic Bikini


Yes, I’m gloating. The lefties on my Facebook feed have been blessedly silent about politics all week. Or they’ve de-friended me. Either way is fine.

A View from the Beach: Rule 5 Saturday – Yasmine Bleeth

PostalDog: Maitland Ward Did the Halloween Thing Too

Animal Magnetism: Rule 5 Friday and Saturday Gingermageddon

Theo Spark: Saturday Totty and Saturday Night Is Bath Night

Sure, the Republicans will disappoint us sooner or later. Until then have a great weekend.



Rule 5 Saturday: Katy Perry Turns Thirty

Katy Perry BeachI discovered today that Blackmailers Don’t Shoot is near the top of Google Image searches for Katy Perry. The reason I know this is that there has been a traffic spike in the last few days from people searching for Katy Perry. Well, the big news is that Ms. Perry is turning 30. It’s not a bad age; I rather liked it and wouldn’t mind going back. But enough about me. Here’s the linkfest.

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: The Concept of Love

American Power: Sexy Girls in Halloween Costumes

The Other McCain: Rule 5 Sunday: Shadows Of The Night

The Daley Gator: Daleybabe Summer Bishil

Nailgun Evi: Pant Suit Rule 5

Katy Perry Blue HairThe Rule 5 post didn’t happen last week because I didn’t feel like making it happen. Sorry. A few things have conspired lately to cut back my extracurricular activities.

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick Of The Late Night and Morning Mistress

Proof Positive: Friday Night Babe Maggie Q

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

Woodsterman: Hunting Trip

Soylent Green: Happy Hour Hawtness

Katy Perry FishnetsHonestly, I had no idea that Katy Perry was so popular. That’s probably because I haven’t been 30 for a few years now and therefore have no idea of what’s cool. If more people in their 30s had that attitude I daresay it would be an improvement.

A View from the Beach: The Woman with Two Faces – Renee Zellweger

PostalDog: Maitland Ward Is New Here

Animal Magnetism: Rule 5 Friday and Saturday Oktoberfest Special

Theo Spark: Saturday Totty

I’m trying people. Until next time, enjoy Saturday.



Rule 5 with Edward Snowden’s Girlfriend

Lindsay Mills ReadingHappy weekend everyone. Edward Snowden’s hot girlfriend Lindsay Mills is reportedly living with him in Moscow. War is not always Hell.

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: The Concept of Love

American Power: Rosie Jones Returns to Zoo

The Other McCain: Rule 5 Sunday: The Consolations Of The Elbows

The Daley Gator: Daley Gator Dailybabe Claudia Lizaldi

Nailgun Evi: Doris Day: Happy 90th Birthday and Rule 5

Lindsay Mills Blue UnderwearI don’t like Edward Snowden, but I admire his guts. At the moment his actions are paying off, but I foresee a gulag in his future.

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick Of The Late Night and Morning Mistress

Proof Positive: Friday Night Babe Grace Potter

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

Woodsterman: Tomato Garden

Soylent Green: Corset Cameo

Lindsay Mills AssJust saying, there’s a good chance that this will end badly for Lindsay Mills and Edward Snowden. But have fun in Russia, you crazy kids.

A View from the Beach: Hu’s Up Next? – Kelly Hu, That’s Who

Valley of the Shadow: October 2014 Tip Jar (and Magickal Gothy Muse)

PostalDog: Pamela Anderson Is Subtle

Animal Magnetism: Rule 5 Friday and Saturday Gingermageddon

Theo Spark: Saturday Night Is Still Bath Night

Enjoy your weekend my friends.

Is Jennifer Lawrence Dating a Washed-Up Rock Star?

Jennifer Lawrence Black SkirtBlackmailers Don’t Shoot has possibly heartbreaking news: the blog’s unofficial girlfriend has reportedly been seen with Coldplay singer Chris Martin. We hope that this is simply a result of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in the wake of the recent nude photo leak, but we are not optimistic.

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: All American Girl Kate Mara

American Power: Emily Ratajkowski Hot in Cosmopolitan Magazine November 2014

The Other McCain: Rule 5 Monday

The Daley Gator: Daley Gator Dailybabe

Nailgun Evi: Redskin Cheerleaders Rule 5

Jennifer Lawrence SadNote to Chris Martin: Your ex wife is not on your side. Gwyneth Paltrow can pretend that she approves of this relationship, but she’s secretly hoping that you fall on your face. That’s the real reason that she is encouraging you to pursue someone who is younger, hotter and childless.

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick Of The Late Night and Morning Mistress

Proof Positive: Friday Night Babe Felicity Jones

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

Woodsterman: Gone Fishing

Soylent Green: Corset Friday Quarantine

Jennifer Lawrence BoobsSeriously, Chris Martin is a bad poet. He can only write in rhyming couplets. That is very lame.

A View from the Beach: Keeley Hazell

Sad Man’s Tongue: Rockabilly Girls Style Gallery 6

PostalDog: Selena Gomez May Be Oblivious – It’s Possible.

Animal Magnetism: Rule 5 Friday and Saturday Gingermageddon

Theo Spark: Saturday Night Is Still Bath Night

Try to enjoy the weekend everyone. I know that this news will make it difficult.

Rule 5 Monday with Anna Kendrick

Anna Kendrick Red CarpetApologies to my readers. Last week was very busy, and the weekend wasn’t much different. The bad news, as far as this blog is concerned, is that we won’t make all of the Rule 5 link posts this week. The good news is that there will be two links for next week.

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: Zexy Asian Chicks

American Power: Sabine Jemeljanova 2015 Calendar

The Other McCain: Rule 5 Sunday: Levitation

The Daley Gator: Dailybabe Saemi Yazawa

Nailgun Evi: NFL Cheerleaders for Week 4

Anna Kendrick ElleThere are no nude pictures of Anna Kendrick, at least thus far. Apparently there are pictures of her smoking, which is a far bigger crime these days.

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick Of The Late Night and Morning Mistress

Proof Positive: Friday Night Babe Denise Quinones

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

Woodsterman: Land of Opportunity

Soylent Green: Corset Friday CockTail Hour Hawtness

Anna Kendrick Red RabbitEventually there will be nude pictures of all of us on the Internet. It’s inevitable. I’m not happy about it, but you heard it here.

A View from the Beach: He Gets a Fancy Safety Suit . . .

Sad Man’s Tongue: Nora Lee Cardigans And Pin Ups: The Perfect Combination – Yep. Looks like Sad Man’s Tongue retired. Any replacement suggestions?

PostalDog: So What Have We Learned — the Fappening

Animal Magnetism: Rule 5 Friday and Saturday Gingermageddon

Theo Spark: Bedtime Totty

Hopefully we’ll be back on schedule after this week’s unexpected delays. I’ve said that a few times, though.

You Also Won’t Find Nude Photos of Kaley Cuoco Here

Kaley Cuoco Bikini SwanNope. I’m not even providing links this time. You all will just have to Google it. I have a headache today. Let’s get this thing going.

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: Penelope Cruz and Her Treasure Chest

American Power: Heidi Klum Flashback Photo on Instagram

The Other McCain: Rule 5 Sunday: The Man Who Saved Britain

The Daley Gator: Dailybabe Ally Maki

Nailgun Evi: Eartha Kitt Rule 5

Kaley Cuoco Bikini CaboWant to know something mildly depressing? The link on this blog that people have clicked the most in the last week or so is the Encyclopedia Dramatica page with nude pictures of Zoe Quinn. Have at it weirdos.

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick – The Batman Is Very Happy Tonight and Morning Mistress

Proof Positive: Evangeline Lilly

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

Woodsterman: Blondes R’ Us

Soylent Green: Corset Friday

Kaley Cuoco BikiniHere’s the story that inspired this post. Nude photos of Kim Kardashian were also leaked. Hardly a story. You could get those by tweeting Kim a picture of a $5 bill.

A View from the Beach: The Girl Of Summer 2014 – Emily Ratajkowski

Sad Man’s Tongue: The Perfect Hour For A Glass Of Pin Up Chocolat Is Now – This is a flashback. It looks like Sad Man’s Tongue might have retired.

PostalDog: Micaela Schaefer Has Stopped Fooling Around

Animal Magnetism: Rule 5 Friday and Saturday Gingermageddon

Theo Spark: Saturday Is Bath Night

Drop some Rule 5 links in the comments. R rated and under will be accepted.

Rule 5 Linkfest with Taylor Swift

Taylor Swift PaddleboardHappy Saturday you lovely people. Today’s linkfest is brought to you by Taylor Swift, for no reason other than she showed up in Google Entertainment news and that might lead to some clickbait. So yeah. Linkfest.

Goodstuff’s Cyber World: Angelina Jolie and Her Bulbous Torpedo Tatas

American Power: Nina Agdal for Leonisa Lingerie September 2014

The Other McCain: Rule 5 Sunday: Are You Ready for Some Football

The Daley Gator: Dailybabe Lorraine Pascale

Nailgun Evi: U.S. Naval Academy Agita with #Gamergate Rule 5 Update – Eh. Anita Sarkeesian is kinda cute. Zoe Quinn, not so much.

Taylor Swift BikiniSpeaking of Zoe Quinn, last week’s Rule 5 post is still getting pretty healthy traffic. From what I can tell, Zoe and her harem are no longer the primary focus of GamerGate. That is definitely a positive development.

90 Miles from Tyranny: Hot Pick Of The Late Night and Morning Mistress

Proof Positive: Another 49’er Cheerleader

Pirate’s Cove: If All You See…

Woodsterman: Special Watch

Soylent Green: Corset Friday Fantasm

Taylor Swift ToplessTaylor Swift was the American Idol chick, right?

A View from the Beach: Rule 5 Saturday – The Girls of Graceland

Sad Man’s Tongue: Rockabilly Girls Style Gallery 71

PostalDog: Daily Duffster

Animal Magnetism: Rule 5 Friday and Saturday Gingermageddon

Theo Spark: Saturday Is Bath Night

Enjoy the rest of the weekend. I might go take a nap.

Destiny Review

Destiny ReviewBungie is requesting that reviewers not post first-day reviews of their new tour de force Destiny. By some coincidence, major gaming websites and online reviewers across the Internet have posted remarkably similar headlines following this request. Here are a few.

Destiny Review in Progress – Gamespot

Destiny Review Diary – GamesRadar

Review in Progress: Destiny – Destructoid

‘Destiny’ Review In Progress – Day One: To The Moon Alice! – Forbes

Where’s Our Destiny Review? – GameInformer

Other sources have their (or Bungie’s marketing department’s) editorial policies, but Blackmailers Don’t Shoot won’t let such petty considerations stand in the way of a scoop. Since fighting off a group of middle school students at midnight, I’ve stayed awake with a 5 Hour Energy reduction playing this magnificent work of art.

destiny-sniperFirst Impressions

It was when I first found myself flying over the snow-capped peaks of Ursula Major on a plasma weapon-laden flying bear that I first realized that Destiny is the best game since the last Halo game. Actually, I hesitate to use the word “game” to describe Destiny. In fact, I hesitate to use any words to describe Destiny, as language is but an imperfect vehicle by which we seek to understand the divine. To call Destiny great is to devalue the very notion of greatness. It would hardly be a stretch to assert that philosophy was invented so that one day mere man could better understand Destiny.

Destiny RiflesGraphics

Destiny doesn’t have graphics as we know them. What Destiny offers instead is a visual experience that explodes from the monitor like a busted Technicolor sewer pipe. In the 16 hours since the game has been dazzling my living room, this review marks the first time that I have taken my eyes off of the screen. Were it not for the sheer beauty of Destiny’s visual display, I fear that by now I may have gone totally blind.


Renaissance man believed that the planets made a celestial music that the human ear could not hear. The truth of that theory has now been revealed by Destiny’s soundtrack.

Destiny TableauxValue and Final Thoughts

The only negative thing that I can say about Destiny is that it has ruined all other games for me. That one negative is mitigated by the fact that I will never have to buy another game. Destiny is so – so – beyond any positive description that I can give, that I am happy playing it on my Playstation 3 and will never have to upgrade to a Playstation 4. I recommend, without hesitation, that you all go out and pay full price for Destiny. You will never need another game and you will never need another console.

Score: Numbers do not go high enough